Season 7 (1982)

Sorry, Wrong Lips
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October 6, 1982 • 30m

Debbie Reynolds plays an actress whose torrid memoirs convince Mel he's the one she remembers as the greatest kisser in her life.

Do You Take . . . ?
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October 13, 1982 • 30m

Mel tries to outdo an old buddy who shows up boasting a track record of fast living and sporting a blonde on his arm as proof.

The Secret of Mel's Diner
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October 20, 1982 • 30m

There's gold in them there walls, or so Mel reckons after learning that the eccentric who built his diner left $20,000 stashed in another building.

Alice at the Palace
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October 27, 1982 • 30m

Joel Grey offers his services gratis as the leading man in a musical revue bankrolled by Mel and featuring Alice. Mel, however, h...Read more

Joel Grey Saves the Day
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November 3, 1982 • 30m

Joel Grey walks out after producer Mel turns a revue about New York into a desert musical with tunes like ""Two Tootsies from Tucs...Read more

Alice's Turkey of a Thanksgiving
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November 10, 1982 • 30m

Alice's meddlesome mother knocks the stuffing out of her daughter's Thanksgiving dinner.

Carrie on the Rebound
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January 9, 1983 • 30m

Carrie is slow to come out of a depression after a quickie divorce.

Jolene's Brother Jonas
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January 16, 1983 • 30m

Jolene's brother pays a surprise visit, but the surprise is on him, he gets an icy reception from his sister.

Alice Sees the Light
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February 28, 1983 • 30m

Everyone takes with a grain of salt Alice's claim that she saw a UFO.

Vera the Virtuoso
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March 7, 1983 • 30m

Vera, whose cello playing can reduce a virtuoso to tears, is asked to play in a local string quartet.

Alice Faces the Music
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March 14, 1983 • 30m

The waitresses pit their musical knowledge against that of three plumbers on a TV quiz show.

Tommy, the Jailbird
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March 21, 1983 • 30m

Alice fears that freshman Tommy is abusing his new freedom away from home by majoring in extracurricular activities.

Jolene and the Night Watchman
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March 28, 1983 • 30m

Jolene can't bring herself to bruise the tender feelings of a bruiser who saved her life and now considers her his girl.

Mel's Dream Car
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April 11, 1983 • 30m

Mel is stripping his gears over his jazzy new Porsche he purchased for a measly $20.

Come Back Little Sharples
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April 17, 1983 • 30m

Mel has had it up to his keister with the way things are going so he absconds to his apartment for a beer and pizza binge.

Vera, the Torch
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April 24, 1983 • 30m

Vera wishes her landlady the worst for evicting her pets then feels responsible when the old crank's apartment catches on fire.

The Grass is Always Greener
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May 1, 1983 • 30m

In role reversals, Mel becomes an employee by accepting an executive position with a catering firm, and the waitresses become owne...Read more

Tommy Fouls Out
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May 15, 1983 • 30m

Afraid that he's lost the ""right stuff,"" Tommy quits the basketball team.

Vera on the Lam
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May 22, 1983 • 30m

After Mel decides to have the waitresses bonded, Vera owns up to a criminal past and takes it on the lam.

Mel's Cousin Wendy?
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May 29, 1983 • 30m

To steal a competitor's secret sauce recipe, Mel persuades his cousin to pose as a woman and apply for a job as a Burger Baby.

Sweet Erasable Mel
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June 5, 1983 • 30m

Mel's experiment with a computer goes well until Vera enters a transaction and erases every trace of Mel's financial existance.

Tommy Hyatt, Business Consultant
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June 12, 1983 • 30m

Using Tommy's marketing advice, Mel increases his business but also learns he's heading for bankruptcy.

Jolene Lets the Cat Out of the Bag
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September 18, 1983 • 30m

Jolene's hair is standing on end with a cat burglar prowling her neighborhood.